I never chose to be a single parent. I too wanted to bring my children, born into a loving relationship, up in a loving relationship. But this unfortunately did not happen. How can the fact that my relationships broke down have turned me from a fine upstanding member of society into the single handed cause of destruction of Britain? Why are absent fathers not blamed for the ills of society, how can it possibly be all our fault, the single mums of the UK. The vast majority of us work hard, very hard, we support our children, love our children, are there for them 24/7, teach them morals and values, run households on a single income, scrimp and save to give our children what their friends have, never show them how difficult it may be for us, how we would love to have another adult around sometimes to talk about the kids, to share their ups and downs with, to help out with the practical stuff.
The majority of single mums are not as portrayed in the press, teenagers who get pregnant on purpose to get a flat and benefits (I in fact have never ever met anyone who would be willing to go into parenthood for the sake of a council flat and £60 a week benefits, you'd have to be very shortsighted!!). All my single mum friends and I are in our late 30s, early 40s, sensible bright talented women who just happen to not be with dad any more. You know, sometimes dads die and then you are a single mum. Sometimes dads run away with a colleague and then you are a single mum. Sometimes dads are so abusive you have to leave, and then you are a single mum. Hardly any of us set out to do it alone (but hats off to you that do as mums are great!).
Parenting is hard, single parenting harder still, but very rewarding too. I am sick to the back teeth of being accused of being responsible for stupid kids looting JD Sports, for teenage pregnancies, for drug taking, for gang culture. Making a baby takes two but destroying society just takes one parent? Give me a break. I am showing my boys that you work hard for what you want, that you work hard at school, value other people, don't litter and don't steal, etc etc. And all the single mums I know are the same, we have high standards and high morals. And we demand a stop to the easy blaming of us lovely, wonderful, fab, strong and dedicated women for everything that is wrong with the world today.
It stinks and makes no sense. It is extremely lazy.
Tuesday, 16 August 2011
I am SO looking forwards to this year's Art Trail, an open studio bonanza of more than 2 participants, ranging from established artists to children displaying their pictures on their garden fence. It runs from 2/9 - 11/9 and there is sure to be something for everyone.
For more details please see www.e17arttrail.co.uk
I am taking part, with friend and sidekick Katy Winter www.stitchupshop.co.uk. See flyer below for opening times.
There are free sewing workshops taking place during the second weekend on a first come first serve basis. And everything will be accompanied by tea, cakes and choons!